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11 February 2011 @ 03:36 am
Fic: Growing old in king-sized beds - oneshot  

Title: Growing old in King-sized Beds - Oneshot.
Fandom: SMAP
Pairing: None, Nakai/Kimura friendship.
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: I only own the idea, this is fiction by a fan for fans.
Notes: English is not my first language, and I apologize for any mistakes. (The grammar mistake in the last sentence is intended, though.)
Also this is my first time writing a SMAP fic, so please have mercy!
Sleeping alone in a big bed makes Nakai Masahiro think about many different things.



201 - the luxury suite room, with a bed big enough for a good three or so people, and yet it felt extremely unsatisfactory.  Lighting a cigarette, he slowly inhaled the dirty poison he loved so and held his breath. Seconds later and short of oxygen, he exhaled in a tired manner, with a barely audible sigh.

Nakai sometimes let himself think how silly it all was, the hysteria, the extravaganza, the pretentiousness of how they were treated these days. In their junior- and early years it had been perfectly ok for them to share rooms, three in one and three in the other. When Mori first quit it had felt incredibly empty and slightly awkward with just two persons in one room, but after a while, as with everything in their line of work, they got used to it. But those days, the two-in-one, three in the other-days, were also something of an ancient past to Nakai. It made him feel old, thinking that way.

The one thing he sometimes had trouble coming to terms with was how they now, all in their thirties, were forced to act their age, forced to get old. ‘Forced’ was maybe not the right word for it, but sometimes he couldn’t help thinking that way nonetheless. Maybe it was the on-off camera thing that confused him; On camera, acting their age was almost not an option. Off camera they were expected to. Expected to be grown-up men in their mid- and late thirties, expected to be serious about work, reputation, lifestyle. They were also expected to accept that all these things were the different aspects in the life of an idol. And they did too. Nakai knew he couldn’t do anything else than this; They had all literally grown up with a camera in their face.

It wasn’t a bad thing. He learned new things about himself every day and about the others too. He didn’t really want to say it, as cliché as it sounded, but they had grown to become quite the family. A family with five different and very strong personalities, perhaps, but a family nonetheless.

As the intimidating neon-red numbers on his digital watch rhythmically and determinedly ticked into the early hours of morning, these thoughts were constantly on his mind. Sleep was crucial for the upcoming concert, but Nakai knew he would lie on his bed silently and stare out the window and into Tokyo’s illuminating nightscape until his alarm would go off. He remembered the countless times when he’d shared a room with Kimura and especially the one time both of them had fallen sick with a cold. He remembered how they were scolded by their manager for not looking after their health and how nice it felt to skip rehearsal that day and just talk about everything for hours. Sometimes it felt so long ago Nakai almost wondered if it ever really happened. It was weird, he thought to himself, that time was something that was both beautiful and precious, and yet had a sense of strangling at the same time.

He put out his cigarette and got up.

As he left his room, not bothering with his boots, but silently jumping into the hotel slippers, he knew he was going against the expectations and the luxury so generously offered him by the agency. He was probably going against his very age and his bitterly reclining hairline, but sometimes it felt good to do the things one weren’t supposed to do.

He gave the door with the number 202 written on it two quick, determined knocks, and decided if it didn’t open within ten seconds he would let it be.

The door unlocked when he had counted up to twenty-four.

“You came for the symphony?” Kimura yawned tiredly and opened the door further for Nakai to enter.

“What symphony?” Nakai jumped down on a bed the same size as the one in his own room.

Kimura locked the door and swiftly stripped out of the worn-out Aerosmith T-shirt, leaving him only in a pair of pajama pants a little too short. Nakai thought he’d seen that pajama years ago, though he wasn’t completely sure.

“You know I snore like a bitch.”

Kimura almost drowned himself in the blanket and turned his back to Nakai.

They hadn’t shared a room in eight years or so, and still Kimura acted completely like he used to, all those years ago.  Nakai couldn’t help but smile.

“Hey Nakai,” Kimura turned, laying on his stomach and his face in the pillow, only one eye open and focused on Nakai, a mere twenty-five inches away.

“Can’t sleep?”

There were a few seconds of silence before Nakai finally let out a sigh and spoke.

“I feel old.”

Nakai could feel Kimura looking at him, though he knew that the other man knew that he was telling the truth. No jokes. Just being honest.

“Well… we are old, Nakai.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?”

“I’m just stating a fact, not trying to comfort you, you old geezer.”

Nakai smiled, knowing that was exactly what Kimura was doing. The man was a terrible liar.

As he listened to Kimura’s breath become steady and starting to snore lightly he, too, felt sleep slowly taking him in.
When Kimura finally thought Nakai was asleep he put the blanket over him too, speaking with a quiet, sleep-sought voice.

“We all were young together, and by the looks of it we’ll grow old together too. It’s like we married… long ago… and have a very… happy… marriage..”

“You are not making any sense.” Nakai laughed, and he felt the figure beside him stir.

“You are supposed to be asleep.” Kimura huffed, slightly embarrassed, and for a few seconds looked so much like his 17-year-old self.

“Goodnight, Captain.”

Kimura mumbled something incoherently before settling into steady breathing and painfully loud snoring.  But it was a snore Nakai knew, from so many years back, and he felt younger just by hearing it so vividly like this again.

Getting old wasn't so bad when he knew he wouldn't be doing it alone.


Current Mood: accomplishedaccomplished
Current Music: Fleetwood Mac
cupnoodle1cupnoodle1 on February 11th, 2011 06:59 am (UTC)
Loved it!!! Wonderful!!
English is not your first language? Really??
You could have fooled me!
Michellemisherru on February 12th, 2011 09:04 am (UTC)
I'm so happy you liked it! Aww, haha, that's so sweet :)
Thanks for reading!
april15_1986 on February 11th, 2011 07:29 am (UTC)
I like it too
This is a nice fanfic. It exudes of a warm friendship. Nice read for a cold night. 20 years of friendship is not a joke. They can truly grow old together, and live life blissfully as friends.
Michellemisherru on February 12th, 2011 09:05 am (UTC)
Re: I like it too
Thanks so much for reading! I'm happy you liked it! <3
Una: J-Men Nakai choo kawaiiscottishlass on February 11th, 2011 07:33 am (UTC)
Very good, I enjoyed this little one shot!! More!!! :)
Michellemisherru on February 12th, 2011 09:06 am (UTC)
That makes me happy to hear! I'd love to try to write more SMAP in the future, they're such lovely lads, ne :)
Thanks for reading! :)
25lalalee3625lalalee36 on February 11th, 2011 12:15 pm (UTC)
It's so sweet... They ought to be close as they always were and we have to hope that even though they're growing up, they won't ever grow up from being so close... ;)
I'm glad you decided to write SMAP fanfic... hope we will see some more from you, cause this one was really heart-warming... Thank youuuuu :*
Michellemisherru on March 20th, 2011 05:36 am (UTC)
That's exactly my hope as well :) Thank you so much for reading! Your comment makes me really happy :)
I want to write more, though as for now I lack the confidence for the longer stuff, but hopefully, someday! there will be something more :)
dictionarysays: smap | super goshdictionarysays on February 11th, 2011 05:29 pm (UTC)
Ohgod. This was ridiculously sweet and very soft at the edges. I really like your Nakai.

Also? First SMAP 'fic? Well I never. I hope this is the start of more to come, missy. 8Dbb

Ngl, just from the title I knew I was walking into something great and then I read it and guh, my heart's all tight from the love and history you've got between the two.

He was probably going against his very age and his bitterly reclining hairline, but sometimes it felt good to do the things one weren’t supposed to do.
YOU GO NAKAI! Also, also, I just really love that you added in the receding hairline because no matter how many hats Nakai-bb tries to wear, we can see~

The door unlocked when he had counted up to twenty-four.
The thought of Nakai waiting until 24 made me D'AWW, and srsly, I could see him doing that too.

“You know I snore like a bitch.”
idk, but this just felt so spot on. I could hear Kim's voice--I wonder if he actually snores? 8D;;

The whooooole process of the two of them sharing the bed so normally, like it wasn't years ago since they last had, was just touching. You've tackled this rather nicely and I like a lot that I can see it all.

OFC. Kimura being all teasing but actually trying to comfort Nakai is soooo, ugh. idk. But the dynamic between them is nice and there's always this history and between the lines and I couldn't imagine it any other way.


And then, you've gotta' end it with this: Getting old wasn't so bad when he knew he wouldn't be doing it alone.

Oh, 2TOOOOOOOOP. I wanna' hug this 'fic and never let it go and reassure Nakai that he's getting better with age, gdi. :Q____

Michellemisherru on February 12th, 2011 09:18 am (UTC)
...I'm almost speechless. I never imagined such passionate comments! ;_; <3
And of course I needed to mention his hairline :P It's so adorbs when he sometimes loses his cap or hat and quickly puts it back <3

I haven't known SMAP for long, my favorite JE group is Arashi, but since November last year I've really come to love SMAP as well! And for Nakai in this story to wait for almost half a minute for Kimura to open up .. I dunno, but I can picture him doing it :)

I am TOTALLY picturing Kimura as a typical "snorer". I mean, he's the perfect man; Everything we see of him is flawless but we haven't seen him sleep! (Or at least, I haven't seen him sleep...I wish i cou-) so BAHA! That must be it. He's a snorer, I just know it. <3

I'm just really moved by your awesome comment.. This is my first time ever writing a SMAP fic and I was actually very nervous to post it, because I'm new to fandom and idk, but your comment reassures me that I got the feel of my idea across.

Thank YOU for your epic comment that totally made my day! <3

maybe I'm the afterglow: a song for your 2tophereticpop on February 11th, 2011 10:36 pm (UTC)
awww, this was so lovable!

I think such reflective fics can be very enjoyable and at the same time I admire people who can write them well, because it'd reduce me into a puddle of goo if I tried - especially anything that has something to do with getting old and time passing, it's a sure downer. like, I think this sentence expresses my feelings about the theme pretty well:

It was weird, he thought to himself, that time was something that was both beautiful and precious, and yet had a sense of strangling at the same time.

and then it's really sweet how Nakai can go against what's expected of him and to sleep in Takuya's bed and how Takuya doesn't even ask what's he doing at his door and just knows and lets him in.

btw, this:
and decided if it didn’t open within ten seconds he would let it be.

The door unlocked when he had counted up to twenty-four.

totally won me over! I mean, I was liking the fic until then, but those little lines made me squee with joy and die. 8D then their whole conversation in bed is just too sweet but quoting it would be ridiculous, so just saying. snoring Kimu had me in giggles. the ending line is sooo cute.

I'm not gonna lie, I hope your first SMAP fanfic is not gonna be the last. :D and 2top pleaze! *bricked*

really liked this. ^.^
Michellemisherru on February 12th, 2011 09:30 am (UTC)
Waaa Thank you SO much! <3

This was my first time writing SMAp and actually also the first time I try this kind of style out..! It's difficult to write about..such clichées really, time and growing old and such, because it really easily becomes too dramatic or too sappy. I hoped so much this fic was neither, and your comment make me feel like I pulled through! <3 This almost wrote itself and I have no idea how or why, but I sure hope it happens again sometime! :P

I love to write but I haven't posted more than a few drabbles before, so I was really nervous about this one..! So you have no idea how happy and thankful I am of your comment! <3

I'm still quite new to SMAP fandom, just since November last year, but I definitely want to write more in the future! And if it's gonna be anything it will absolutely be 2Top ;D (seriously, this pairing...agh.. I'm completely weak for it..!)

Again, thank you so incredibly much for your heartwarming comment, I'm so happy (and relieved!) that you liked it!

ficofthegoblin: kimura/nakai seriousficofthegoblin on February 16th, 2011 11:05 am (UTC)
Welcome to SMAP fandom - it's a damn fun place to be! And thank you so very much for your fic, which is a beautiful, gentle piece of comfort. Like hot chocolate on a cold night. It reminds me that platonic love is lovely too! ♥
Michellemisherru on February 23rd, 2011 02:45 am (UTC)
Thank you! And yeah, I like being here, and I look forward to read more lovely fanfics in this comm!

I'm very glad to hear you liked it! Really, I was so nervous for posting it as I'm still new to SMAP fandom, but I'm happy it turned out like this, to be my first SMAP fic..!

Thank you so much for reading and commenting <3

(and of course, I've seen your name around, and read some of your awesome stuff! I really like your style, and I'm eager to read more!)
ficofthegoblin: kimura/nakai funnyficofthegoblin on February 23rd, 2011 11:12 am (UTC)
Thank you! Very nice of you to say so. :)
Nadyahpswf1 on April 29th, 2013 01:08 pm (UTC)
Love this♥